For me, you gain respect and you earned respect (how does that sounds?).
Gaining respect. I believe you gain it by building your reputation in society. For example, you joined a discussion group. You give excellent idea, your astonishing thought, your wide knowledge about discussion topic and your confident, all of those, you will gain respect from your teammate. Respect that you are actually someone knowledgeable, someone who can stand on his own, someone who they know, should be respected.
Earning respect. This one is kinda... well I don't know whether this analogy would work, but I think it goes like this. In a group of gangster (sorry, can't find better analogy), you are the leader. You earn the respect just because you are the leader and not because of what you have with you. At any time, at any rate, your minions can rebel and take you down.
Now, I think we could see the different between these two. Gaining respect ensure your position, putting yourselves at a safe position and you can guarantee yourselves as one of the respected member available there.
Earning respect is temporary. Your position is yours to keep and mind you, at this point, you won't actually survive it without being tyrannus (ok that's a word from [spanish? I think] meaning tyrant,evil, mean).
The point here is, though gaining reputation seems better here, remember one thing though. Building your reputation is not easy and it's not easy to gain respect from that. One simple mistake, one disfavor act, will cause you lost your reputation, hence decreasing respect you earned from other people.
I have lost respect to some of the people. And some of them might even keep their dirty work at bay to avoid losing respect from others. Note that, you can't hide it forever. People will eventually learn and know it.
p.s. : something for thought after sahur.
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